About a month ago our son, whom we hadn’t
seen in a while came home for a weekend. He had graduated college and now was
in his own apartment with a new job, living about one and a half hours away. I
was anxious to see him and to hear about his new career and what he was all
doing. He is the baby of the family, and
the last one to leave. One by one, all eight children left the nest for a life,
all their own. The last one leaving though stings just a little more because
now there are empty bedrooms, no more school conversations and the sound of doors
opening, and closing are far and few in between. There are less distractions
and more prayers. Lots of more prayers.
On the day our son was leaving to go back ‘home’ I was sitting in my recliner, and he was on the couch doing something on his phone, with the tv on. My husband was in his chair and no one was speaking. My husband says to me, “I haven’t heard a lot of conversation between you two. Don’t you have anything to talk about?” I thought about that as I was sitting there. We did have our little talks but right now I didn’t know what else to talk about that would convince him to put down his phone. I know some people would say, “Well, shame on him for spending his last few hours on the phone instead of holding a conversation with his mom. Kids these days, just no respect.” However, after thinking about it for a bit, I decided I didn’t feel that way, not now, in this moment. I discovered that I didn’t need to tell him to put down his phone and talk to me. He just being there was enough. He was ‘home’, ‘really home’, and it was just like it had been a few years earlier. Just like old times, with him lying on the couch, doing his own thing. I watched him with a smile on my face, enjoying that time because I realized his presence was all I cared about. True, he wasn’t talking to me, but just him being there was all I wanted. He was there and as I watched him, a flood of memories with all the kids being home filled my mind and warmed my heart. I was enjoying the time now, because even though there was silence between us, there was love. Our son knew I would always love him, even when he was occupied with his phone and I knew he loved me, even when I was silent. I was content, knowing he was content. He was there…close by, and that was enough.
My mind then drifted to God, our heavenly Father. Perhaps that’s the way it should be in our relationship with Him. God loves when we talk to Him. He desires that we share our dreams, our questions and our hopes. Then, that day comes when you have a need, but you think that maybe God won’t listen to you because you haven’t been praying regular, you’re not doing your devotions faithfully, and you didn’t even thank Him for your last answered prayer. You’re feeling a bit guilty and you wonder, “Will God really care about my prayer now; now when I finally take the time to talk to Him?” Yet we pray anyway because prayer seems to be our last resort and we really need Gods help, so we pray and hope He is listening. We need Him to answer but no answer seems to come. All there seems to be is silence. Indeed, those times can be difficult for us, We wonder if He really hear us, does He really care or is He just too busy with more important issues, We think He may be upset with us for only coming to Him when we need something (sound familiar with your kids?) None of that is true. God does care. He hears your prayers, every word and every thought. God loves you and perhaps, in that moment, He just might be sitting back, watching you. Perhaps He is enjoying your presence as you pursue your dreams and hobbies, as you read that book, enjoying your friendships or just doing your everyday routine. His heart is warmed as He watches you being content in all the blessings that are yours. And though you may think He is not answering, rest assured, He is preparing the way, always working on your behalf. It may not always be what you ‘want’, but it will be what is ‘best, for you. One thing is for sure. He is always with you, always has His eye on you and His ears are always open anytime you talk to Him. But, maybe now, all He wants is to sit back and enjoy what He sees. His special, unique and cherished creation. He is smiling, knowing that someday, you too, will come ‘home’, but not only for a weekend. You will eventually be coming ‘Home’ for good. Until then, He is always faithfully and lovingly with you, watching, listening, and enjoying you. And that, my friend, should be enough. Just His presence should warm your heart. I hope it does.
The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you but will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17 NIV